Your profile represents you to potential playmates. Before a single or a partner sends you a message or before they reply to a message sent by you, your profile will most likely be seen.
Photos
Images are extremely important in profiles. It’s what initially attracts people to see your profile.
If you hope to be successful in meeting other sexual partners online, you MUST post pictures on your profile. Many couples fear that someone in their public life will recognize them. If that’s the case, you may be in the wrong lifestyle.
Many services allow you to have public photos and private photos.
We have found that some people choose to post public photos without having their faces blocked and other people, like us, block our faces in our public photos. We personally choose to block our eyes, however whether you choose to block only your eyes or your entire face or not to block at all is a personal choice. The important thing is that whoever is viewing your profile can have a good idea of what you look like and if the two of you are an eye-catching couple.
In both public and private photos, you must have at least one CLEAR photo of BOTH together.
This photo doesn’t have to be the main photo and it probably shouldn’t be.
We recommend taking a trip to some porn websites and looking at the photos that are used as album covers and also looking at those adult friend finder type ads that pop up with photos of the so-called single woman who wants to meet you.
Usually it is the male half of the partner who does most of the work online to figure out which partners to send a message to. So, try to figure out which photos your male half finds attractive and would want to click on and try replicating them in your own private photoshoot and use one of those photos as the main photo to entice people to view your profile.
Understand that too many profiles contain only the female half of the dating period. DO NOT fall into this trap.
Remember that most of the time you will be EXCHANGING partners with another partner and the female-to-male attraction is just as important as the male-to-female attraction. Let people preview what they get before they commit to contact you, which only makes it more awkward to say no thanks once they finally see your male half.
Also, the separate photos of both the man and the woman, but no photo of them together, screams a fake profile.
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Nobody likes a profile that is ambiguous or lacks content. It is always a hassle to have to inquire about certain preferences. We are going to keep this extremely simple. For best results, be VERY clear about the following:
1. Indicate what you are looking for. FMF, MFM, MFMF, etc.
2. Indicate if it is: Soft-Swap or Full-Swap
3. Indicate if you play: Only in the same room or Good with separate rooms
4. Indicate if your female half is: bisexual, bisexual or heterosexual
5. Indicate if you are drug and disease free (if you have NOT been tested in the last 6 months, you honestly have no idea if you are disease free or not, so don’t lie)
6. Indicate if you can host
7. Please indicate if you can travel
8. Indicate if you play bareback or practice safe sex.
9. If you are asked to indicate a weight, BE SURE TO INDICATE it and do not lie. Some of you may be wondering why this is important. If a man looks at your profile and sees that glaring “0”, he will think you are seriously overweight. People often equate being overweight with being unattractive. Simply enter your weight. Most men have no idea how much a woman should weigh anyway and only look at the pictures, but a “0” is just a big red flag.
10. Please indicate your actual age. Basically all services require you to indicate your age. Be honest about it. If someone viewing your profile can say that there is no way you can be 35 years old and you are actually 50, they will start to wonder what else you will be dishonest about. Just be honest.
Aside from the above, additional information you may want to include is:
1. A short description about the two of you (how long have you been together, why did you join the lifestyle, what do you like about the lifestyle, is it athletic, etc.)
2. Check out anything that doesn’t interest you (for example, single men)
3. Age preferences, limits or ranges.
4. Physical preferences or requirements (penis size, ethnic requirements, athleticism, etc.)
5. General limitations or requirements (how you plan to exchange images, need for voice verification before the meeting, all first meetings are just meetings and greetings with no expectations, etc.)
If you address each of the twelve items listed above, your profile should be very detailed and allow anyone viewing your profile to have a very good understanding of what you are looking for and what you are not looking for.
Certifications / Validations
Most online services have some kind of certification / validation system where people you know can certify that you are “real”.
In all the services we use we have certifications. Some of them we have a significant amount. The simple truth is that if you have ZERO certifications, that will be a red flag for many, ESPECIALLY if you have been a member of the online service you are on for more than a year. The question that will be running through the mind of the other person is: “What happens to them that they do not have certifications after supposedly a year of swinging?”. Lifestyle experience has also shown us that most profiles that contain zero certifications are in fact bogus.
This means that you want to certify those you know, even if you don’t play with them. Typically, you will receive certifications in return. It will give you legitimacy and indicate to those who view your profile that you are a real couple and will alleviate some of the tension that comes from dealing with someone new online.
However, keep in mind that too many certifications can have a negative impact. If you have a very high number (what is considered high will be different for different people), a partner who sees your profile can interpret it to mean that you will sleep with anyone and that this will turn you off. We personally don’t care. We feel that our certifications speak for themselves and in fact we play a lot and if that is not for the other couple that sees our profile, we respect it.
We have known other couples who do not accept more certifications above a certain number and others who will accept new ones but will eliminate an old one for each new one they obtain to keep the number within a certain limit. We have also come across couples who believe that it is nobody’s business to sleep with and that they will not give or receive certifications. We believe that they are simply making dating a bit more difficult than it needs to be as a result and we do not encourage refraining from certifying and receiving certifications.
Paid or not paid
Trial and free memberships come with restrictions and a stigma, too. Typically, lifestyle services offer “lifetime memberships” for a couple hundred dollars. If you really want to meet other couples, just pay the membership fee. Free members shout “not serious” to everyone who reads their profile. Since membership is so cheap, many who look at those profiles will simply think that if they were serious, they would be paid members. Also, many services allow members to block trial and free members which, as a free member, would limit the number of partners you can interact with. We recommend acquiring a membership. It’s just another indication that they are a serious couple.
Headline
Many services allow you to put a small headline or banner at the top of your profile. Many times, in addition to your main photo, this is all they will see. We suggest looking through the different profiles that attracted you to online services and the type of headlines they had and use a headline that briefly describes you in a positive way or what you are looking for.
Conclution
Sure you can skimp on creating an incredible profile, but it will be to your detriment. We believe in simplifying life and having a wonderful profile just makes it so much easier to attract couples or singles (if that’s your preference) to you. Do yourself a favor and dedicate your time to yours, you won’t regret it.