Lean on your difficulties

The reason you fear obstacles is that you doubt your ability to overcome them. Obstacles are rarely the problem, it is our lack of power to overcome them that gets in the way. For example, have you faced a difficult situation in the past and are you worried about not getting through it? Remember as best you can the circumstances and how you felt. Now fast-forward the months since it happened and remember the same situation from a fresh perspective. Can you see how insignificant it seems from your current perspective? That is, we feel unable to overcome challenges instead of believing that we will be fine. Perhaps it is the element of surprise or the fear of being powerless to face the problem that scares us the most.

It is what the author and psychotherapist David Richo refers to in The Five Things We Can’t Change: And The Happiness We Find By Holding Them when he says: “We worry because we don’t trust ourselves to handle what happens to us. We worry because we don’t trust that the way the splinters fall will work in the best way. We worry because we haven’t said yes yet.” Therein lies the point: recognizing the obstacle rather than wanting it to go away. I’m not talking about unexpected events like a speeding ticket or your romantic interest in not returning a text message. While I recognize that this can cause distress for some people, I am referring to larger issues that demand our deepest inner strength. Saying yes to what happens means leaning toward your difficulties even though it may seem untenable at first glance. However, if approached with an open mind, we will overcome it and gain valuable insights.

There is no other option but to be brave

Your inherent power is one of endurance, determination, and courage. Do you think this power is available to you? Sometimes we will not know the depth of our power until we are tested. I have faced many challenges throughout my life, including the death of one of my parents and accepting a life-threatening illness. I didn’t realize that I had the power to overcome those experiences until I had to. In the years that followed, not only did I develop greater willpower, but the experiences softened me and I developed a humility toward life. I came to appreciate that this entity called life is much bigger than me. I came to look at it reverently and to recognize that while I am a small cog in the process called life, it works perfectly regardless of my thoughts.

Not everyone shares my perspective and that’s okay. I would not want to impress others with my views because they are exclusively my own. I have met many people over the years who went through similar experiences and each person formed their own meaning from the events. Can you reflect on the events in your own life that changed your perspective? Was the change for the better or was he angry with others, maybe with life? It is difficult to know how we will react in difficult times. Sometimes there is no other option but to face our difficulties and step into battle with fierce determination and courage. For example, if your loved one wants a divorce, you may wallow in self-pity and claim that you haven’t seen the writing on the wall. You can experience sadness for months or be brave through it while this is happening to you and see where it takes you, not because you want to, but because there is no other option; sometimes there is no other option but to be brave.

Therein lies the key message of this article: when there is no other option but to be strong, life calls us to exert our greatest strength because what we are experiencing may be greater than we think. When we have no choice but to step into the fire, what awaits us on the other side is a journey of self-discovery, knowing that we are more resilient and courageous than we imagine. It is what the author Alex Pattakos refers to in Prisoners of our thoughts: Viktor Frankl’s principles for discovering the meaning of life and work where he writes: “Courage is not the absence of fear but the awareness that there is something more important.” I remember those who lose their homes in a fire or their life savings to scrupulous insurance companies that undermine their trust or those whose family members betray them. These things happen to good people every day and many of them have no choice but to face their challenges. Relying on them, we develop the ability to yield to the forces that oppose us. We learn The obstacle is never greater than our power to overcome it.. It is our willingness to move toward it with faith and determination, relying on experience itself, that will activate our inherent power.

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