Do you know what luggage is? Baggage is an unresolved issue from the past that has not been resolved. Baggage can be a huge detractor when it comes to dating.
Do you have any old baggage from your past that is weighing you down? Wherever you go, do you take your ex with you, including dates with new people? Do you talk about your old problems incessantly?
Luggage can be like a growing pile of dirty clothes in your bedroom. It’s no way to start the day. You cannot be efficient; can’t find what you need; You can’t even enjoy what you have because you have to clean up the mess first.
The same could be said of a person’s life. Before you can start your day, you have to deal with yesterday’s mess. Of course, no one says you HAVE to, but whether you realize it or not, it takes a lot of energy to ignore it.
What exactly is a disaster from your past life? Relationships that have ended badly, with broken agreements and hurt feelings. Divorces and breakups usually make up the majority of them, but they can also exist between family and friends.
Cleaning cabinets and drawers has a miraculous effect on your sense of well-being. When you do, you begin to attract new people and events into your life. The same principles hold true for emotional disorder.
So how do you clean up a mess? It’s about forgiveness.
HOW TO CLEAN IT:
Make a list of important relationships that have ended.
Ask yourself: Why are you no longer close to this person? Can you bridge the physical or emotional distance? Why did the relationship end? What was your part in the disintegration of it?
Get in touch with the people you want to talk to.
IMPORTANT EXCEPTION: If you are no longer emotionally or physically SAFE with someone, ask a good friend to stand in for you and act out this process with you. You can also do this with someone who has passed away: Imagine that he is sitting in a chair across from you and saying what he needs to say.
Say something positive.
Check where the relationship is now. Mention some positive characteristics about them that you remember. (EVERYONE has some positive traits) Recall a worthwhile memory of a time you spent together.
Apologize.
Own what you did, what you regret, apologize and ask if they can forgive you. Be brief and don’t make excuses. It does not matter that they made you – that’s for them to raise (They may not feel like they did anything wrong and therefore don’t want or need you to forgive them. If this turns out to be true, work on forgiving them when you’re alone.) The goal of this process is NOT to make them own what they did, it is to disengage you from the guilt and anger you feel when you think about this person. Whether you know it or not, you carry old events in your mind and heart and they cloud your current relationships.
Don’t have expectations.
Be careful not to have an agenda for how you want someone to react when you apologize. They may be in denial; they may not be able to see your part; they may even gloat that you’re apologizing. You cannot be attached to the result. After apologizing, you’ll know if you want to have them in your life or let them go, depending on how they respond.
After clearing away the baggage of the past, watch your love life improve. You don’t need to drag that old baggage. travel light You deserve it.