No matter how hard you try to avoid it, there will always be a crisis in a marriage. I don’t think there is such a thing as the ‘perfect marriage’. A man and a woman who never had the same upbringing living together under the same roof can only sustain themselves through tolerance and perseverance. There will always be mistakes and misunderstandings, the way a couple responds to this will largely determine the level of crisis in the marriage.
A long-standing misunderstanding that the couple doesn’t address enough is a time bomb about to go off. Marital crises are caused by a number of factors: lack of common interests, career interference, miscommunication, outside interference, and marital infidelity, to name a few. A combination of these can lead to serious marital problems that may even lead to divorce.
For a marriage to survive the test of time, a few factors must be present. Let’s look at some of these:
Importance of communication:
If a couple doesn’t communicate or has difficulty communicating, that relationship is not going to last. The level of communication in a marriage is a determining factor for the marriage to survive or not. To live in peace and harmony, a couple must be able to share their common dreams, goals, desires, interests, and activities that they love. If you have children, you should discuss your plans for them, your home, future vacation plans, etc.
Couples today have no reason not to communicate; modern technology has made it easy. You don’t have to sit face to face to communicate, with cell phones, Blackberry and other digital devices you can talk to your better half hundreds of miles away. Every other person you see walking, driving, sitting in the park, or standing in line is using their cell phone to communicate with someone.
Share common interests:
If a couple has children, this will be a matter of common interest. In addition to children, a couple should share their hobbies, sports, and outdoor activities. A common cause of marital crisis arises when the man spends time with his friend, drinking, watching TV, talking and laughing together while the woman stays home to take care of class and chores. It is a potential trigger for problems. You must put the interest of your family behind that of your friends. The same happens with the woman; she should not be more interested in the company of her circle of friends at the expense of her families.
Sometimes the couple’s individual careers take them in different directions. This can strain the relationship if a regular line of communication is not established. Another way to avoid a crisis here is to make sure you have plenty of mutual activities scheduled weekly or bi-monthly.
Cheating on your spouse:
This is the most explosive factor that causes a fatal marital crisis that often results in a divorce. Try at all costs to avoid infidelity. Be satisfied with your spouse: The couple should never compare their better half with others. A smart husband or wife would always avoid any emotional entanglements at work or anywhere else. If they learn to focus on their home, their partner, and their family, they rarely stray. Both partners should try to spend some time together when they are fixed up and at their best.